Anything Goes

Times have changed And we've often rewound the clock Since the Puritans got a shock When they landed on Plymouth Rock. If today Any shock they should try to stem 'Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock, Plymouth Rock would land on them. In olden days, a glimpse of stocking Was looked on as something shocking. But now, God knows, Anything goes. Good authors too who once knew better words Now only use four-letter words Writing prose. Anything goes. If driving fast cars you like, If low bars you like, If old hymns you like, If bare limbs you like, If Mae West you like, Or me undressed you like, Why, nobody will oppose. When ev'ry night the set that's smart is in- Truding in nudist parties in Studios. Anything goes. When Missus Ned McLean (God bless her) Can get Russian reds to "yes" her, Then I suppose Anything goes. When Rockefeller still can hoard en- Ough money to let Max Gordon Produce his shows, Anything goes. The world has gone mad today And good's bad today, And black's white today, And day's night today, And that gent today You gave a cent today Once had several chateaux. When folks who still can ride in jitneys Find out Vanderbilts and Whitneys Lack baby clo'es, Anything goes. If Sam Goldwyn can with great conviction Instruct Anna Sten in diction, Then Anna shows Anything goes. When you hear that Lady Mendl standing up Now turns a handspring landing up- On her toes, Anything goes. Just think of those shocks you've got And those knocks you've got And those blues you've got From that news you've got And those pains you've got (If any brains you've got) From those little radios. So Missus R., with all her trimmin's, Can broadcast a bed from Simmons 'Cause Franklin knows Anything goes.