Makin' Whoopee

Every time I hear that marchin' Lohengrin I am always on the outside lookin' in Maybe that is why I see the funny side When I see somebody's brother take a bride Weddings make a lot of people sad But if you're not the one, they're not so bad! Another bride, another June Another sunny honeymoon Another season, another reason For makin' whoopee A lot of shoes, a lot of rice The groom is nervous, he answers twice It's really killin' That he's so willin' to make whoopee Picture a little love nest Down where the roses cling Picture the same sweet love nest Think what a year can bring He's washin dishes and baby clothes He's so ambitious, he even sews But don't forget folks That's what you get folks, for makin' whoopee Another year, or maybe less What's this I hear? Well, can't you guess? She feels neglected, and he's suspected Of makin' whoopee She sits alone Most every night He doesn't phone her, he doesn't write He says he's busy But she says, "Is he?" He's makin' whoopee He doesn't make much money Only five thousand per Some judge who thinks he's funny Says, "You'll pay six to her" He says, "Now judge, suppose I fail?" The judge says, "Budge, right into jail You'd better keep her I think it's cheaper than makin' W-H-double-O-P-double-E whoopee"